For the past year, every time I have been out to the club,
these words have echoed in my ear. They say “tonight, I want all of you
tonight. Give me everything tonight. For all we know, we might not last tomorrow,
lets do it tonight!” Then a girls incomprehensible mumbling takes over, until
Ne-Yo comes back even stronger telling me to “grab somebody sexy”. That part, I
agree with. The former, however, makes me deeply uncomfortable.
The idea of giving one person, one job, one goal, one
whatever, everything, is deeply unsettling to me. Like putting your eggs in one
basket, if they drop you, or you drop it, what do you have? Nothing. You gave
everything, though. I feel like the holding back pattern is one that I’ve
adopted. I have been reluctant to give all of myself to my endeavors. Whether
that means not giving all of myself to God, not giving all of myself in social
or romantic relationships, or not giving all of myself to a goal by being over
committed, I am reluctant to give one thing everything, all at once. That seems
like a fast track to being let down…. No matter how enticing Ne-Yo and Pitbull
make it sound.
What about you? Are you in the process of giving your all to
a person, place or thing? How does it feel?
No comments:
Post a Comment